Turning the tide, and my new idol- Leslie Goldman.

  Just a few weeks ago, I was lucky enough to be able to attend the biennial Delta Phi Epsilon Convention in Miami. Being a founding sister of the Gamma Lambda Chapter of Delta Phi Epsilon at Caldwell College, I never thought I would have the opportunity to attend such a special, educational, and fun convention- especially not one in Miami!

  On the first day full day I was there, our morning started with a general session at breakfast, where I was lucky enough to be in the presence of the lovely and talented Leslie Goldman. I had seen Leslie on the Today show several times, and thought that she was amazing- she true understands how to empower women and make them not only comfortable but confident in they're own skin. 

  Leslie has truly inspired me to take on a higher role in promoting positive body image.

Every woman, whether she be tall, skinny, short, thick, blonde, brunette, light skin, or dark skin, can pick out something bad about herself. Why should we all feel this way? I know even I am guilty of sitting in front of a mirror wishing things about myself to be different. Sometimes, I don't even want to leave the house because "my hair is too straight" or "I feel fat in my clothes." A girl should never let her supposed bad physical appearance stop her from doing something she had planned, or something that she has to do. After all, everyone says that beauty is on the inside.

  The average American sees an estimated 5000 ads per day. Most of those ads use sex to sell. So in the eyes of the average American, sex appeal is the answer to everything. I know I have never seen an ad that has help boosted my self esteem (besides of course the Dove Real Beauty ads). If more companies started to produce ads using real women, and real men for that matter, maybe 6 year old girls wouldn't be trying to go on diets. I know that number of 6 years old sounds young, but I once babysat a 6 year old girl who refused to eat the pasta I had made her because she was "cutting carbs." I nearly burst out in tears.

  Its time to turn the tide on the kinds of ads we see everyday. Most of those ads are completely fake people, as Leslie Goldman taught me a few weeks ago. For example, H&M uses completely computer generated bodies for their models. Yes, they use real heads, but all they do is swap real heads on fake bodies. I'm not making this up, H&M even confessed to the claims. Check it out for yourself- http://jezebel.com/5865114/hm-puts-real-model-heads-on-fake-bodies . 

 

 Why does H&M have to use fake bodies for their models? Are they that ashamed to put their clothes on real people, those real people that will be wearing those clothes?

too sexy, too soon?

With Aerie's recently release of a push up bra that is targeted at girls as young as 13, some parents are furious. The bra was released with the idea that it would help girls feel "pretty." Although this idea seems reasonable, I found the thought of 13 years olds wearing push up bras a little off. There is a time in every women's life when she should be feeling sexy, and I don't believe being 13 is the right time for that. I believe that the push up bra will only draw negative attention to the girls, which will in turn make them feel worse about themselves. Whether that attention is negative from older men believing that the 13 year old girls are trying to make themselves look older, or from other girls calling them sluts.... it will all hurt. This may not always be the case, but I can recount several times in my life when I had been called a slut, and several times I had used the word to refer to other girls... I can say from experience, that word hurts. Showing to much skin, or too much cleavage can easily be the cause of that. "look at her! she's dressed like a complete slut!" I can already hear the words echoing down middle school hallways. So I say, lets save the sexy for girl later in their teen years, and to all those 13 year old girls out there, enjoy being a kid while you still can. Trust me, life is much easier there!

an email i recieved....

Let’s get something straight right now.

You are not:

Your body.

Your job.

Your money.

Your possessions.

Your thoughts.

Your fears.

Your self-image.

A victim.

Other people’s opinion of you.

You are:

Love.

A unique expression of the energy of The Uni-verse.

A spiritual being having a human experience.

Creative.

Beautiful.

Connected to abundance, always.

Here to give.

There are TONS of people with LOTS of money who are not happy. There are TONS of people with NO money who are happy. If you’re like me, you want to have  enough money and be happy. To me, that is freedom. To be happy in the world with the freedom to do what I want whenever I want, but also to know that I am in this world but not of this world, and so, not have the world and it’s “things” bog me down.

The implications of the statements made above are this: live your purpose, not your fears. When you live a life and make decisions based on what brings you joy, and then share that joy with others (this is what it means to live your purpose), then things work out. They may get rough at first, or painful (just like pushing out a splinter is painful), but the pain will pass and you will see that you are living a magical life.

If you are not those things listed above and you are the things that are listed, then what would that mean? It would mean that you could cast off the so called “weight of the world”, forget about what “other people” think and train your mind and body to rise above your fears. It means that you could take massive action daily towards living your purpose (aka your dreams) and that it would work out. It would mean that you could face your fears and actually RISE ABOVE THEM by doing so.

It means that you are free to express your love however you feel it should be expressed. It means you have everything you need, and if it is not now here in your life, it will show up exactly when you need it.

See yourself as already connected to everything you desire. You do not need to “create” anything really. All you have to do is move around what The Uni-verse has already created for you to match your desire. You are lacking nothing; you are connected to everything. Surrender the thoughts of fear, lack and limitation and dive deep into possibility. Live from possibility.

Act from possibility and you will soon experience the impossible as possible. Don’t give any attention to what other people think; stay silently true to your dream and let them watch.

Live your life and dreams knowing that some other people won’t understand what you are doing, that struggle is really a way for you to become stronger and that anything is possible when you remember who you really are. Let go of who you are not and dwell in possibility.

my favorite song

this is a song i would like to share with all my readers out there, whoever you may be. I think its a song that really helps you to see you're own beauty, and allows you to be comfortable with who you are. It is my "theme song" to my life. Bomshel is also my favorite band, because they write such powerful songs and sing them soooo amazingly. Look them up! They're great!

after so long.... I'M BACK :)

hello everyone :) after not blogging for so long, i'm back. now, my target will be less on girls body images, and more on how we can work on building our self confidence. i have seen so many girls get destroyed by the envy of other girls. like my first blog post stated, its a girl eat girl world out there. i wish we could solve this problem, but maybe we can. by taking small steps, like instead of envying other girls and hating them for what we don't have and they do, why can't we compliment each other and point out each others strengths? we are all beautiful inside and out, and we all have our own strengths and weaknesses. for instance, english was never my forte. not really english, but reading. (but i love writing as you might be able to tell...) I HATE READING! why? because i was never a fast reader, and i get bored of a book very easy. the only books that i can speed read through are ones that i can somehow relate to my life. reading was always a huge weakness of mine, while writing was always a strength. and although it was a weakness, i never let it stop me. we have to be confident in our strengths, and accept our weaknesses. so to work on battling this girl eat girl world together, i offer you a small challenge. when you're on facebook, or hanging out with a group of girls, maybe some you don't know so well, give at least one TRUE compliment per day. turn envy into a good source of happiness. giving another girl a smile and a little boost of confidence can go a long when. on the other end of that, when you receive a compliment, instead of saying NOO WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT! think about what is being said, and say thank you. really let that compliment sink in. no, that girl wasn't lying to you when she said you were beautiful or that you're hair was perfect. you really are, and it really is.


"Success makes so many people hate you. I wish it wasn't that way. It would be wonderful to enjoy success without seeing envy in the eyes of those around you."
— Marilyn Monroe

Portia De Rossi on her eating disorder

The girl who takes the hardest hit

Although I've been trying to keep my posts open to the images of both girls and guys, this post is definitely going to be more girl oriented. Not all I want to do here is talking about the problems that the media causes, but I also want to offer a source of inspiration to keep going despite the bumps in the road we come across with hating our appearance. And, maybe I've talked to much about appearances. I know when it come to me, I didn't only hate myself for the way I looked, but for the things I did. For instance, "why did I say that?!" or "why did I give up that chance?" In the end, it all turned back to the girl who was staring back at me in the mirror. She was the girl I said the nastiest things about. After comparing myself constantly to the girls in magazine and all the girls that were my so called, "friends" on facebook popping up on my news feed, seeming to have perfect lives, my tongue was always certainly harsh towards that girl in the mirror. The thing about it is, just like everyone else in the world, she didn't deserve it. She didn't deserve those destroying words just as much as the next girl didn't. And even though I knew that, she was the easiest of all targets, and it was almost addicting to hate her. One time I looked at that girl in the mirror, and all i could see was pain in her eyes. Thats when I knew I had to start treating her right. I started out simple. A little smile in the mirror, instead of grabbing at my stomach. The hardest part about it was not saying one bad thing about my self. But overtime, I began to see the true beauty shining through this girl that seemed to be hidden under a concrete wall of hate for so long. I won't say it was easy, it wasn't. It took me 9 months to have complete self confidence, and even then, there are still times when I want to say the "omg your skin looks horrible!" Instead, I just walk away from the mirror. She doesn't deserve that criticism. I know many girls go through the same thing I have, and even if you don't think you can make the change in your life to love yourself, YOU CAN!! Take it from me. I'll be your (almost) daily motivation. The girl in the mirror doesn't deserve what she's getting right now. She deserves confidence and love from the person that matters most, you.